On the second night of the Declare Conference, I found myself in my hotel room deep in thought. Several of the speakers had mentioned a verse or two from Psalm 139 that day. A couple of the speakers had gone beautifully deep into that piece of Scripture. It really struck me how that text kept coming at me over and over again.
Here I have these verses that I find beautiful and powerful. All summer I have had encounters with these words, but not yet memorized them. Here also I found myself struggling with insecurity and anxiety all summer long in a way that I had not experienced before. I began to see a connection between those two.
I opened my Bible to Psalm 139, and I read the words there. So good. I read them again. And again. I probably read that Psalm five times, letting the words wash over me. Speak to me. Show me truth. Heal me of places I didn't even know were broken.
That wasn't enough. I needed more. Since I had my iPad handy, I selected a different translation and read it again. The big ideas were the same, of course, but there were different nuances in the language that opened it up even more. So I switched the translation again and read it some more. I continued reading the same Psalm in eight or ten different versions. Meditating on the words and allowing them to penetrate my soul down to the inmost places.
I still needed more. So I switched to a version in French. I haven't read any French since high school, but I just wanted to see how it sounded in that language. Not a French linguist or scholar by any means, but I remembered enough of it to pick out the main points. The beauty of God's Word was just as powerful in another language as it was in my own. I was in awe of the powerful message in those twenty-four verses.
I don't need to be afraid of falling short. I am enough. I do not need to worry that someone else is doing something more, better, or different than I am. I am enough. God made me to be enough, complete in His design. I can accept me for who He made me to be. The areas I see as weakness were put there by design. I am enough. Just as I am.
God made me. He stitched me together with exquisite care, making no
mistakes. He crafted and wove every teeny, tiny little detail of me.
He knew me--and had a plan for me--long before anyone else. He is with
me on all sides, behind and before. In short, He loves me in a way that
only He can. He is more than enough. He can handle all my problems, all my insecurities, all my worries, all my anxieties. He is more than enough.
I came away from that experience feeling refreshed and relieved. I had a new sense of identity. That night I laid down some things I had been carrying around for a very long time. I know who I am and Whose I am.
I am enough. God is more than enough.
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