Sunday, October 18, 2015

Psalm 139:15-16a - The 31 Day Challenge

"My frame was not hidden from you when I was made in the secret place, woven together in the depths of the earth; your eyes saw my unformed body;"
Psalm 139:15-16a

I remember that day about nine years ago when my husband and I went to the doctor.  We already knew that we were expecting a baby, but that day would be our first ultrasound.  We knew what an ultrasound was, and we had certainly seen pictures of other people's ultrasounds.  But we did not realize the impact it was about to have on us.
I had read all the "expecting" books.  I have taken a handful of child development classes in college and later in my career.  I knew which parts were developing at that stage and the approximate size at 12 weeks of development.  True to my nature, I had done some research, and I knew what was coming up on that screen.  Right?

When the image came up on the screen, we were completely blown away.  "That is a baby!" we repeated over and over in complete and utter awe and amazement.  To see a real, living baby moving around inside of me struck me to my very core.  Of course, this moment is all about a mother and father getting their first glimpse at the baby to come and the swell of love that accompanies it.

But it was so much more than that too.  This was not an embryo.  This was not a fetus.  It was a baby.  A perfectly formed person.  A teeny-tiny person, but--without a doubt--a person.  There were fingers and toes and a precious little face.  We listened to the heartbeat.  We saw the baby move around.  I even saw what looked like a wave at one point.  "Hi, Mommy.  I'll see you soon!"  This was a perfectly formed, living person.  It was a baby.

That awe and amazement stuck with me in the coming weeks, and even now I don't feel like I can adequately describe it.   God's design in creation was never more clear to me than in that moment.  This was no accidental combining of cells; God made that baby on purpose and for a purpose.

This was a defining moment for me.  Not just as an expectant mother, but as a Christian.  As a person.  I used to think that there were circumstances beyond a person's control where a pro-choice stance could be justified.  My position on that changed when I saw that ultrasound.  God doesn't make mistakes, and He wouldn't allow a baby to be created where He didn't have a plan and a purpose for that unborn child.  Even when we can't see His hand at work, God has "woven us together in the secret place."

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